Back to the basics for emotional regulation

By Libby D’Orvilliers

Have you been feeling overwhelmed, yet underwhelmed at the same time? — Yes, I have been too.

During these unprecedented times and also simply the mess that is coming of age that commonly occurs in college, I have been desperately seeking “something to turn to” in order to settle my mind’s racing, circular and unhelpful thoughts.

Lately, I have been experiencing rather pessimistic and gloomy feelings about the future of the country, the world and just things in general. Evidence points out that I am not alone in this feeling. 

An article that was updated just this past week on the “current events” advice page betterhelp.com, emphasized that in recent years, an increased percentage of Americans are experiencing “significant stress about the future of the nation.” Additionally, the JED Foundation has a whole resource page full of links to articles surrounding the topic of “political anxiety.” These feelings are real, and apparently, quite common. 

If you are experiencing this sort of malaise lately as well, I am going to share with you some of the coping strategies that I have been testing out lately, in hopes that you will try them out and see what benefits you.

To begin, as basic as it sounds, I have recently rediscovered the tool of just going for a walk outside and listening to a guided mindfulness practice. While it sounds simple, when I have been getting overwhelmed by feelings of anger and frustration, I have found that a quick lap around Centennial Lake and listening to reminders telling me to take deep breaths through my headphones can help me regulate and de-escalate my intense emotions, while still allowing myself the quiet space to process and experience my feelings.

Staying in the more obvious realm of self-care strategies, writing down what you are grateful for can be extremely helpful in lifting your spirits. While it can be beneficial even just thinking about what you are grateful for, if you want to maximize the benefits of gratitude, I recommend taking the extra two minutes out of your day and physically jotting down your thankfulness on a piece of scrap paper.

My sleep has taken a hit as a result of the stress of being a college student compounded by the stress of current events. It is crucial that you prioritize sleep to maintain a healthy balance of emotions. If that means opting out of a late night study session in the library, do it. The homework can wait an extra few hours, your well-being must come first.

In times of heightened emotions, it is helpful to set boundaries with your friends, coworkers, professors, family, etc. by saying “no” to spontaneous discussions of politics. Let them know that you are not currently in the headspace for such discussions and table the topic for a later time.

And finally, just turn it off, even if it is only for a little while. In the worst moments of these recent emotional experiences, it can feel like the world is ending and people only care while it is trending. Unfortunately for me, my anxious feelings last longer than the 24 hours in which the trending Instagram story lives. It can be undoubtedly difficult to do, but logging off from the constant media exposure might just help lower some of this anxiety.

Not to say that the breaking news updates are not serious or deserving of my attention, but maybe the constant stream of them can go on mute for a bit. I need to regulate my emotions so that I can not only focus on my studies, but also focus my frustration into something actually productive. This is in contrast to simply letting my emotions get the better of me and losing my temper at those around me for things they are not responsible for.

The general consensus seems to be to focus your energy on taking action to correct what is upsetting you, which can actually make you feel better. Yet, I understand that this can be daunting and seem overwhelming, especially with the increased pressure to “do something” by the media and peers. My advice is to start very small and mentally work yourself up to larger actions.

While I encourage everyone to find what positive coping skills work for them individually, I hope that this non-comprehensive list can get you started in working towards more peaceful internal — and external — dialogues.

Finally, if you see me storming laps around the lake, it is best to give me a few minutes before you ask me about the homework for our politics class.

Libby D’Orvilliers is a junior psychology major